New episodes every other Saturday. Subscribe wherever you listen.
Subscribe on YouTubeAnd we're back.
We're back.
I think our first ever podcast again.
Replace.
I was gonna say, I'm so down with just calling the Fake Problems podcast.
I think that rolls up the done.
It sounds good. Let's do it.
So welcome officially to the Fake Problems podcast
where I don't know, stuff happened.
We talk about some fake problems, some real problems.
Yeah.
There's real problems. There's two white 30-year-old men can have in this world.
Damn right.
But, you know, so what's going on, dude?
Had a...
Had a...
When it's some open mic last week?
Die out.
So you do some open mic?
Yeah, you do that.
So I can sell it.
You witnessed the...
It's pre-intense.
The bombing.
Dude, it makes...
And we had this conversation shortly after we left.
But the bombs are some of the funniest moments.
I mean, at least...
Oh man, when I was doing that black club joke, it was so bad, but so funny.
Because the angle was going in like...
It made it just sound and racist.
I know he wasn't trying to be racist, but it was just like...
Yeah, black people just don't get humor.
It's the vibe I was getting from the whole thing when I know he was trying to say like...
It's hard.
It's got to be hard to be a white comic and go to an only black club.
Oh yeah.
Like, it's...
The thing is his joke wasn't bad.
It just...
He... the way he...
The lived delivers.
Making it...
Like...
Yeah.
It's like if you don't have the confidence, sometimes it comes off as like...
I don't know.
It... it confuses everything.
If you don't have it, your joke sucks.
Even if it's a good premise, even if it's actually a joke on paper.
Dude, literally that's the...
Anyone who was like just kind of rolling and fluid, it didn't really matter what they said.
I know.
That one black comic who was kind of just like a loud...
Like he had some good stuff.
But it was like mostly because he felt like...
He was confident on stage.
I was like, haha funny.
It's weird.
Yeah, I mean there's...
Confidence is the most important starting out.
And just getting to that place.
Which...
Dude, that's my goal.
That's my...
Yeah, so for me I felt like...
There were positive and negatives for that.
Yeah.
Believe it or not, that was probably the most confident I was on that stage.
I don't know if it probably didn't come off that way, but...
You see him, if I have other ones.
The only watching it and knowing I'm going to be a nervous right as well.
Like there's obviously people who are more confident.
Like when you have contrast of someone who's super nervous but no one was really nervous,
you just seem like you were up there doing it.
But you weren't on the black comic guys level.
He's so comfortable up there.
The guy must have been doing it for such a long time, it feels like.
But I mean it was good stuff at the same time.
It's just with the...
Without being like pop in like the black guy.
Yeah.
It obviously doesn't hit as well.
Well that's...
Yeah, that's my goal.
But you don't get there man.
Dude, we'll get there man.
That's the thing.
For my first...
And like...
Maybe you'll realize as to...
Yeah.
I feel like you'll be better than I was for my first one.
Dude, I come off as confident in like,
friend circles, watch me break down.
It's going to be bad.
I promise you.
The thing is that the biggest lesson I took away from my first one is like,
if I can't speak the way I normally do in a social setting,
everything's going to suck.
Exactly.
And I've been writing stuff for, I mean years.
And you're like this realistically like a year.
And I picked like my favorite thing out of that.
I mean, I got some laughs but...
Yeah, absolutely.
A lot of it just flops.
And it's like, wow.
Dude, it's just real.
What you said before, the material doesn't matter.
It's all about like getting up there and then having...
I mean, don't get me wrong.
You could have bad jokes that just fucking suck.
But I think we both have the wherewithal to make good comedy in terms of writing.
But that it's going to all come down to us practicing and getting to the point where
nerves are like a second hand thought.
You're just going up there like, are you doing this again?
And I think I talked about this a little bit last time.
But when I was a teacher, the whole beginning of me teaching was being nervous.
And then eventually it just goes away.
It just stops.
Because your body just so used to doing it.
And eventually like, there's got to be some adaptive mechanism in your body that just decides like,
oh, this is not real straight.
Like you shouldn't be stressed out about this.
Because nothing's going to harm you.
Kind of, it won't.
But kids were fucking snapbacks sometimes.
They hurt, dude.
Kids are going to read you like a book.
What's the most cutting thing a kid ever said to you?
Fuck, dude.
Kids are honest.
They are.
Why, what age did you teach?
Fourth all the way through eighth.
At one point in time at that school.
But I'm not.
It was, they're, most of the kids were pretty good.
But they'd be like, I don't know.
Most of the bad stuff would come from them just being like,
you're dumb.
Or like, like you would put a lesson plan together and like,
it being a new teacher, being in any field new,
you just fuck up shit all the time.
But there's like obvious times where I'd be like,
I, you know, I had party the week and before.
And I'm like doing a lesson, the kids would just be like,
what are you doing?
And he's like fourth graders.
And I'm like, fuck.
That's so tough.
It's just, you're just saying they're like, but you know it's shit too.
It'd be way worse if I was like confident in the material.
And then some kids like, yeah, this is so tough.
And it's like, you don't know what you're talking about.
Which that does happen as well.
It's tough as the deepest cutting thing.
Just your dumb.
That means you knew you were dumb in that moment.
Because they know they can feel, if you can't explain something
to a fourth grader and they call you dumb, not good.
But you can also, they can also just not as most humans do.
And I imagine in the comedy world, it's the probably super com,
or people just don't like what you're talking about.
And so they're just like, this sucks.
Yeah.
Not because it actually sucks.
But because we're like, nah, not for me.
Yeah.
And you get that a lot with teaching.
Because you're trying to jam Wisconsin history down kids' throats.
And they're like, what?
Shut up.
Pussy.
Teach us about like rocket ships and fucking volcano.
Seriously.
Did you teach about that?
Oh, yeah.
Science and history.
So I got a cool side of teaching.
But then the history ones like,
Wisconsin history, ancient civilizations, which are kind of cool.
But for me, like the kids are like, I don't know,
you talk about like when the wheel was invented and how there's like,
civilizations from 5,000 BC, we don't know how they disappeared.
It was probably just for my starvation.
Just heavy conspiracy theories.
A lot actually.
I'm down there.
The more you can make a mystery, the more they're like, what?
What the fuck?
Seriously.
But yeah, if everything hits the fan for me,
I would be happy just teaching science to kids.
I feel like that'd be a fun time.
Wait, what do you mean if everything hits the fan?
What are you talking about?
If my life just falls, I guess my life fell apart.
You're just a bit more exciting to teaching.
The worst on in my opinion, way harder than being a f***ing.
Really?
In terms of like, I mean, dude, yeah.
I guess like mentally learning this stuff to become a f***ing is a hard part.
But once you have it, there's not like,
kids just throw a new shit at you all the time.
And there's no like right way to do it.
Every kid's so different.
So there's a different solution for every different kid.
There's different problems and different parents.
And it's like, in my opinion, hell on earth.
Okay.
So just backside, dude.
Dude, I feel like you probably developed so much empathy from that.
Just like dealing with parents and kids.
All different kinds of people.
It's a mixed bag.
Because there's, you know, you get, you'll get the best.
The kid who's awesome, whose parents are awesome.
But then you'll get like, a kid who's awesome, whose parents are just like,
don't give a shit about the kid at all.
And then you start to feel for that kid because their parents don't give a shit.
But then you'll get situations where both the kid and the parents are shit.
So there's mixed feelings across the board.
Every time I have parent teacher conferences, it'd be like, you know,
you're excited about 10 to 15 of them.
And then like 20 of them, you're like, oh, god, I don't want to do this.
Because sometimes you have to have hard conversations with parents and be like,
your kid is falling behind.
And we've tried A, B, and C methods where I'm like,
dedicating a good portion of my time aside from just teaching for this kid.
And they're still not doing well.
And a lot of the times the parents just think it's like,
if nothing's working, they point to you.
And they go, well, you're not doing something right.
And then I have to look in where to be like, am I fucking up?
And that's just one kid, one family.
And that can happen in all 30 of those two here.
I'm telling you, it wears on you so hard.
It's supposed to be in fresh out of college.
I'd be like, I had just been drinking straight for four years.
And then I just teach, I'm just picturing you talking to parents such as soundtracks.
Yeah.
We're just having them in a classroom.
All right.
Your kid's doing okay in history.
But in science, he just, his volcano, he didn't finish his project.
So we're going to, we're going to mark Billy down and the book, wait, what?
What do you want to work him down?
Like the second something bad happens, they think like, is my kid dumb?
And then you have to be like, no, no, no, no.
Most of the time it's like, yeah, kids fuck this.
Did you have like eight through half grades?
Or did you have some other type of grading scale that like didn't sound as serious?
It was just points based.
Okay.
Where we didn't give like legit grades to it, it just be like, there's no report cards.
Monosauri is a little different, which it turns out way smarter kids.
In my opinion, because it's more like, you kind of let kids do, you have a, you know,
a foundation of curriculum, but you let kids be curious in terms of learning development
and kind of let them choose their own way.
It like, it's like, I don't know, you don't put parameters on where their brain can go.
And it leads to a lot of healthier outcomes in terms of mental development.
So, but no like ABCD, like, just points.
And if, if any kid ever had something that was like an F or a five out of ten or whatever,
you go, you can redo this if you want.
There's no like, you get a fucking bad grade, you're done.
You give unlimited retries to get better at the thing.
So, which is more like the real world?
Yeah.
Like, if you fuck up on something, you can typically like work at it and do it again and fix it.
So, it's good for the kids.
For sure.
Yeah.
But anyway.
Nice.
Yeah, too.
Alright, so open likes happen.
We went to that.
Fucking solid.
Uh, what else was going on last week for you?
Oh, man.
This is where you just get dead air for.
That's okay, dude.
Fucking, it's alright.
You got work stuff, fine.
All good.
This is just like the...
Yeah, yeah.
Work's bad intense.
No, yeah, ever.
You mentioned that one day.
Yeah.
Just dealing with a lot more people.
There.
No.
Has you alluded to?
Where he'd out.
Yeah.
These are adults.
I know.
Yeah.
It's dude, one thing.
When you're a teacher, you notice that a lot of people don't really change much in terms
of when they age.
Like, you see the same exact behavior.
Most of the time when you see a parent, you see a kid, you're like, oh, that makes sense
because they act similar.
But whenever I look at adults that are kind of acting weird nowadays or like out of controller,
you can literally see like the kid in them.
It just never got...
Don't get me wrong.
Everyone will have some like out, you know.
Some wild stuff happen.
Out, not out break.
What's the word for it?
Outburst.
How about that?
You know, where someone loses their shit.
We're all gonna lose our shit at some point in our life.
And it's just like the kid in you and you just have all this experience wrapped around it
trying to contain that thing.
All the time.
But it's just in there.
That same person that was like in fourth grade is just has a little bit more like memory storage.
Yeah.
Like it's weird.
It's so strange.
You just gather more information.
Literally.
You just have more experience.
But like that person's still the same thing.
There's just like all this stuff around it.
So you're gonna go on record and say people never change.
I don't know because they do to an extent.
But like there's inherent stuff that never changes in you.
You know, it just sits.
And doing that, you can probably like if you're a terrible person, you can probably work on it.
But there's traits to you and me and everyone that are like just like,
locked in as like call it your personality that don't really, maybe there's wiggle room,
but they just sit still.
And you see it, you know, the less you try to work on yourself, the more you just stay in the same state you were.
It's like a 10 year old.
And that's for a lot of people.
I mean, at least in my experience, a lot of adult life, worked with, met, talked with,
a lot of them have a mindset of a much younger person.
It's not a good way, you know, not like a free young, in like a way that's just immature.
In mature childish and like holy fuck.
It impresses me how people can like operate like that.
Like continue to succeed and be working on that level of like,
I feel like we talked about this a little bit last time.
I'm just, it's crazy that they're still alive.
Do you think some, they would just make an array of mistakes that would just...
Do you think anyone says these things about you?
Yeah, for sure.
I'm not immune to it.
Absolutely.
I think if anything, probably more, well, I can be really goofy.
But I don't know, probably my younger years, not kid years, but like, you know, college coming out of it.
But there's definitely some stuff or probably someone would be like,
yeah, he's fucking immature, dude.
Yeah, but we all got blind spots.
Working on it.
Working at that.
It'd be our podcast title.
Working on it.
As we just decided one.
Let's change it every week.
We were the fake problems one, the no-dune working on it.
Working on fake problems.
Yeah, there we go.
It's pretty tight.
Yeah.
So, but all right.
Works a little stressful.
How about weekend?
What'd you do?
Oh, what did I do this weekend?
I broke my sober streak.
Sounds like a pretty good weekend.
Good week, good weekend.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's all right.
How about you?
So, after open mic Thursday, dude.
Oh, okay, hold on.
Some crazy, not crazy shit, but kind of wild shit happened.
You know, crazy, but not wild.
In between, I bought this big thing from Whole Foods of this stuff called Stumpton.
It's like Cold Brew, like a big bottle.
Okay.
And I didn't know it's a concentrate.
So, like two ounces is like a full cup of coffee.
I should have known while drinking it because it was so bitter.
I drank like two 20 ounce cups.
And this is Thursday.
And I was so high on caffeine that I was like stutter breathing.
Like 10 cups of coffee?
Yeah, dude.
I was flying.
And we were talking and the storm wasn't going to happen on Friday.
Yeah.
I literally, I didn't sleep Thursday at all.
Like I literally, because of the coffee.
So, I just laid in bed, didn't sleep, didn't even drive home on Friday.
I was like, I got off work and I was like, I have to sleep.
I was like, the like I just done a fucking like, I don't know, going to binge with fucking math or something.
And then I slept and it was fucking good.
But they got a fucking label that shit better.
I guess it's on the label, but it was just weird.
I bought this cold brew and I was like, fuck.
It was really good in the beginning, because you're, you're high.
I mean, I got so much done at work.
It's pretty fast.
Yeah, dude.
It was like doing, but in a cup, okay.
It was so weird and it tastes so bitter.
Like the strongest coffee you've ever had.
But anyway, that happened in sleep, slept Friday, drove back to my parents' place.
I don't know how your family is, but when you guys get together, do you guys ever just do like,
go to little shopping places and like bounce around to some like kitschy stores and stuff like that?
Yeah, I mean, my mom does that.
Yes.
My dad gets pissed.
We have the same thing.
Another similarity because same exactly.
I think that's all parents.
It's gotta be.
I mean, growing up, there'd be times when like malls were big.
I feel like they're probably still big, but like we'd go to a mall and my mom and my sister would shop for like
three hours, then me, my brother and my dad would just sit on like a bench in a mall and it's fucking awful.
You just sit there and back in the day, well, I guess you could have like game boys back in the day, which was unbiased.
Oh, yeah, dude.
I think I'm gonna sit alone on a bench by myself, like a loser.
No.
But so we wanted these kitschy stores in Chicago and I get in this situation where 90% of the time I'm there, I'm like pretending to be interested in stuff.
Like, what is this?
Yeah.
And like, otherwise I'm just standing there staring at a wall like a fucking weirdo as people like walk.
You're so close with people like super small stores.
Yeah, what is it?
Yes.
And I found that fat Damon thing at one of them.
It was pretty nice, pretty awesome.
Do they have like a wall of those cards?
Was that a poster?
They're like little, I don't know.
I think it was just a card.
Like you send that to someone, which I don't know why.
It was the size of like an envelope card, you would send to someone.
But it was just, it's so strange that it's like that's a thing to do.
It's just go and look at stuff.
Yeah.
With no intention of buying anything.
I mean, there's nothing worse than being dragged along at any store.
Really?
Yeah.
When you don't have a reason to go to the store, you yourself to buy something and you're like,
yeah, come to the store.
Like, why?
Why suffer?
It's, it's, it's, and I don't mean to bitchbox because I love my parents and love
hate out with them, but it's for sure.
It's just, what are we doing?
We could do anything else.
Is that all you did?
Did you do anything else?
We wanted the store, we went out for food, we chilled at my sister's place, but like the main event,
was shopping at small stores.
That's tough.
I know.
We need to get some hobbies.
Because it gets, the more I think about, those things are just fillers for people that don't do anything outside of work.
Dude, I, I feel that way about a lot of hobbies.
Yeah.
Which, which is brutal because every hobby is a filler.
Right.
But it's like, yeah, I guess it went, the more we talk about the more it sounds do she to be like.
It does.
How dare they enjoy that thing they enjoy?
It sounds do she to shit on other people's hobbies, but internally I do it all the time.
I guess it's different though if I'd be like, hey man, I'm gonna learn to play a guitar.
You're gonna have to sit and listen while I play the whole time.
That's the difference I see.
Make up someone else to your hobby.
Where that's I'm like, I'm all for all of the situations where I have to now be into your hobby.
But at the same time, I don't know what, my parents are just trying to find us stuff to do when we're together.
So I get it.
It's me bitching in circles and just eating my ass the entire time.
Eating my ass sounds like not the right way to put it, but you know what I mean?
Yeah, that's the time to snake that's like eating itself, that symbol.
It's a lot more sense.
That's why I feel like a lot more sense.
Not eating my own ass.
But kind of eating my own ass.
Topics.
Let's go.
Let's transition.
You got something?
I feel like maybe.
Okay, so I'm looking.
So I was wondering.
I feel like we need, I mean, we've talked about having recurring segments.
Yeah, I feel like we need to just come up with more of those.
Yeah, yeah.
We got cry moments.
We got something to follow.
We got what was the second one?
Something like the Ohio train thing.
Like some a story.
Yeah, yeah.
That would be kind of like dig deeper than everything else we talk about in the podcast for a month.
Yeah.
Similar, we'll have monthly movie watch and just talk bullshit about weird movies.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like, sounds like something we could do.
Just like niche, like poorly rated movies that are also hilarious.
I think, yeah.
There's a lot of them.
So, but roar I think is an amazing, I mean, roar has an amazing like background story.
These other shavings we're going to watch probably won't.
This one's like, you know what?
I've never seen Sharknado.
Oh, really?
I would love to see.
I mean, that one's like leaning into it being ridiculous.
Like the movie, the people who made it know this is so fucking crazy and wild.
Did they know that for the first one though?
Because there's a bunch, right?
There's like five of them.
Yeah.
I don't know for the first one, but you got to think if you're in the right room and you're like, listen.
What if there is a tornado that was so strong that it pulled sharks out of the ocean and it just ran its way through an entire city.
Is that the part to the sharks just live in the tornado?
Yes, but the sharks are like actively part of the tornado's dangerous level.
Like they're like, they're the one who's starting to eat people.
Yeah, like they're in the tornado, but they're like doing most of the damage.
They're getting thrown at stuff and they're chomping down shit.
And Tara reads in it, who's fucking babe, if you know what that is.
I don't.
There's already a picture.
She was like a 90s to 2000.
She's like every movie is like the hot chick.
Oh, fucking American pie.
She's one of the guys girlfriends.
Not the guy who fucks the pie.
And they're like, they're like only doing oral stuff.
And then he find these to fuck right at the end, but she, she, she, I feel like she got her big break there.
We're like, damn, she's a babe.
Dude, no joke.
American pie was huge, man.
It was.
That era was fucking nasty.
All right.
But for recurring segments, I think those three for now, unless we think of anything else that's crazier.
I guess or fits.
But anyway, I guess with that, we should probably talk about the Ohio train thing, any updates on that thing, which do you have any?
I don't.
All right.
I read a little bit more and it's just turning to the standard story of like every hazardous chemical thing that a company ended up fucking up.
They're just trying to cover everything up and the government's in on it.
It's just like they're just ignoring everything.
There's smoke clout over the city.
The water looks like reflective like oil.
The mayor had that video of him not drinking the water, pretending to drink the water.
Like, mmm, good.
Like you do a baby when you put any vegetables.
And there's, oh, I saw a fight.
There's apparently, how in a home legit this is.
I watched a video.
But this, people are starting to sound like Mickey Mouse.
It's like a fact in the bridge.
Dude, there's a video of this guy telling, oh, like, I don't know what's happening, but I'm going to go to the doctor.
And you're like, oh, fuck.
It's like, it's like, it's like people are so horrible.
It's hilarious.
It's so calm.
Yeah.
I highly advise one of my kids.
Oh, it doesn't actually talk like Mickey Mouse, but he sounds like Mickey Mouse.
Oh, geez.
The vinyl chloride in the air is really doing something to me.
And it just sounds like that the whole time as he's being interviewed by a reporter.
Wow.
So it's affecting people for sure.
And the government can use it to be like, it's safe, dude.
It's totally safe.
Don't worry about it.
Just go on about your day.
And we're already not hearing as much about it.
Yeah.
That's compared to when it first started.
It's always, it's already been like just a sh-
Any story ever.
Yeah.
It's kind of, it's weird, man.
I feel like the farther you go back, the more journalism used to be about literally, it was the good thing.
It was the thing exploding the things that need not exploding.
That's the wrong word.
They're doing investigative journalism to like, I don't know, even the plane field for the common folk.
It's like people don't get away with her end of shit.
They'd like go figure shit out.
And now it's all based on like, what will get you the most internet traffic, which is, it's strange, I don't know.
And major corporations own the news.
So the influence can- is business-based.
Yeah.
It's due.
It's like,
I think a recurring segment has just talked about the system.
Wow, I'm just talking about the system.
It's just for fucking effort.
Yeah.
And don't get me wrong.
We live in one of the best places to live.
It just continue- we live in also one of the most unique places.
I mean, this was- this country was found on the fact of like, independent democracy, which opened up in the past.
Until then, nowhere like that ever existed in the entire- most places were still ruled by a sole power at the top.
And you know, the president, it's to preside over the people.
It's not to rule.
That's why they call them a preserve.
Exactly.
So we- this whole country has the foundation of the people run this thing.
But it's slowly starting to erode, like at its core.
As we see now, with everything being influenced by business.
What business is not bad, it's- it's growing the government.
Business is good.
The- the less government you have, and don't get up, still in the government.
Are you a libertarian?
I'd say so.
Yeah.
But there's also- there's extreme versions of that too that people will like-
Like Ron Swanson?
No, he's a good version.
But there'll be ones who will like- they'll have little like anarchism and libertarianism.
Sometimes people will take libertarianism and go all the way to anarchism and still say it's that.
Where- anarchism is no government.
Yeah.
Literally.
Which is a terrible idea.
That means no law and order, no police, nothing.
We just hope everything works out.
Which is proved to not work.
In situations where a government gets toppled or like a political leader gets assassinated
and they have no one leading and then it just falls into chaos.
So, libertarianism is the idea that, you know, government should have-
We still have law and order.
So, we still have some level that.
But then it's- it always falls apart in any situation because you need someone to keep check
on the people keeping check on the people if that makes sense.
Similar to how you'd have a third-party company testing your product to be like, hey, this works.
No.
But how do you do that with people?
There's always going to be bias on every level in any direction you go with like the checker's checking the people who need to keep everything in check.
There's no like perfect solution.
I think we just need a strong monarchy leader.
I just want a king.
We essentially have that right now, dude.
I mean, it's weird because big businesses now are kind of like-
Don't get me wrong.
It's not on the level of like 99% of the people are living like mudhots and there's a camp at the top.
How it used to be for most of time.
It's in the line of businesses are the new kings though.
Like the CEO of Coca-Cola or like a Mark Zuckerberg, like they are the guys at the top.
They can essentially control a lot because the government controls so much.
If the government didn't control so much in order to change something, they'd have to do good by you.
Because they're selling a product.
And if it's not good, you just go to a different thing.
So the control only comes from us saying, yeah, we want more of that thing.
As opposed to the government just being like, no, we'll just subsidize that, prop it up,
or like take money from them and write laws in their favor.
Like maybe I mentioned this a while ago, but like before not having the sugar label on the nutrition facts for like Coca-Cola,
so to companies so they could just like put whatever in there.
There's so many laws written for companies because they just lobby politicians.
So I don't know the solution to all I know is separate business and government and lessened government power.
I don't know about the military though because I always get like crossed on that.
Like what's your take on that?
What we have to put into context.
We have the largest and most powerful military by far.
Yeah. And people relate like China's military power.
They have more people, but we spend like 1.7 trillion every year on military power,
which makes us, we're like the world police.
Literally.
You still need to watch that because it's the best take on the whole situation, but we are that.
We're the only country that really does like, oh, there's people on the other side of the world being like oppressed.
Let's go help them out, which is usually just a twisted version of there's something we want to know that it has money or value to it.
And we use that image of we're helping out and we go slaughter hundreds of thousands like women and children in an effort to get like oil or gems and diamonds.
Like we just tell everyone we're not doing that.
Like the Iraqi war was weapons of mass destruction were over there and that was all a ploy for oil.
Yeah. The whole thing.
There's hundreds of thousands dead from that war that had no A.
Well, no weapons of mass destruction. So no reason in the first place.
But B. Half deal we are most of you we've killed had no connection to terrorist groups.
They're literally just people that we just bombed or tortured or murdered in an effort to be like,
you ever got to keep this facade up that there's weapons of mass destruction.
And it just happens.
So what's your take on the other side?
I don't know, dude. That's just, that's tough. That's heavy.
It is. I think there's also the other side where if we weren't the superpower of the world,
there are people that hate us. There's people that want to kill us.
Yeah. I do.
Dude, why do you think 9-11 happened?
I'm not doing that.
If we if we never went to the Middle East, that would not have happened.
They hated us.
Yeah. Because of what we've done in their country, there was this giant PR propaganda moved by the United States saying
they just hate our freedom. That was like a thing for a while.
We would say they hate how free we are here and that's why they attacked us.
But we really got over there and killed hundreds of thousands prior to the actual Iraq war.
If we didn't do that, we wouldn't have this like, and then the Patriot Act came out after that,
it all kind of works for the government.
We're like, they now have the ability to, if they have suspicion of you, they can just arrest you and detain you via through like the FBI.
So I need to do it. Guantanamo Bay.
Even if you have no connections to terrorism, that was the Patriot Act in paraphrasing majorly.
They can just do whatever they want in terms of like, if they think you're a terrorist, they go, you're a terrorist?
Come here.
They just didn't prison you for a long time.
Shish.
Yeah.
So, well, you know, I'm under the umbrella.
So I...
That's true. You're good.
Don't have to worry about it.
But to the point of, if we had the opposite way, say we weren't spending 1.7 trillion and our country was like a Norway or a Sweden,
which is the extreme example, because they're like in any war, they're going to get destroyed by a super power.
But what happens if the United States isn't policing the world?
Does it all fall apart?
Does Russia just start taking over?
Just trying to just start taking over?
I mean, now that we're in this position, I feel like we can't just be like, you know, I don't really want to be anymore.
True.
We're too deep.
We're too deep.
Fuck.
Which...
But I wish we could just like...
Not...
It sounds super wrong because there are people suffering in places in the world that we have tried to help, but it's ended like Vietnam's another great example of us being like...
Alright, we're going to go over there and try to fight the Viet Cong and liberate Southern Vietnam.
But then it just didn't work.
And it's...
Like, when we pulled out of Afghanistan recently, do you know all those videos they were flying around like people like holy onto the planes and shit?
Oh yeah.
Because we essentially propped up a system there that was like trying to impose American democracy in a place that it was like...
Kind of farther back in time that we were in terms of principles on how they were working and the second we pull out, it just all goes back to the same.
I'm glad to immediately.
Yeah, so it's almost...
It's impossible unless you like conquer the nation and you make it a territory.
Which is all...
That's just evil.
That's what I'm saying.
That's imperialism and it's finest.
So it's like, do you just let people get tortured and killed in a place that like what can you do?
This is why we...
Like, there's such complex issues that there's no good solution to.
And you either have to use absolute brute force and take and take and take and make it your thing to make it safe.
But then that comes with its drawbacks.
There's so many casualties that fall to the sides of that.
It's like to accomplish things on a grand scale.
There's going to have to be violence of some sort.
So much.
Every time.
Which is horrible.
Yeah.
But...
And then...
Yeah.
Fuck.
I don't know, man.
Every time I get in this loop, I try to think of like a good way to go about the thing.
But we have teams of people working on this stuff all the time that are of high, high intelligence.
And there's no good answer ever.
It's just like...
It's weird because I feel like it's also riddled with good intention.
Like most things are like, we want to go help this person.
We want to stop this war.
We want to...
I don't know.
And then it just turns sour.
So quick.
And then you soon have to like ignore the...
The tons of people you're killing.
And then once you start doing that, it's like, what else are you ignoring?
If you can ignore you killing people.
You can ignore anything.
Alright, you can stop it.
That's just so fucking dark.
These are real problems, man.
These aren't fake problems.
Alright.
Alright, let's see what we got.
Not military related.
Um, okay.
Oh, dude, random thing I saw.
Have you ever greased a watermelon and like tried to play with it in a pool?
Like try to...
Oh, man.
Like...
Do you know what I'm talking about?
I'm all right into mass murder and torture.
Right into water.
What did you ask?
Yeah.
You greased...
So like you're in a pool and you grease up with it, like put butter all over it or something.
Some fat.
So, you know, the water, you know, it's what?
Hydrophobic, the fat.
And you try to...
It's like...
I came into hell.
Or some...
You have to try to get the thing.
And there's a bunch of people trying to get the thing and then fucking...
Whoever holds onto the watermelon.
Do you do that recently?
No, I saw...
Like a video of people doing it, like that was like a fucking blast dude.
That looks awesome.
Yeah.
I mean, we do like similar things in a pool growing up.
We're like...
Someone has the ball.
Do pool games as a kid?
You see some of the most intense shit you'll ever do.
Like trying to stand a mat.
I feel like we did king of the mat a lot.
I feel like there's a lot of...
It's like more high risk because someone's almost always drowning.
When you're playing those games, like there's...
Yeah.
The more people in the pool and the more inflatable stuff, there's always some kid who is at the pool.
Trying to make it up under someone's feet.
I've been that kid many times.
There's a lot of flip them from underneath.
Yeah.
Doing something and being like, I can hold my breath for 30 seconds and find out you just can't.
And you're like, oh, oh.
I'm gonna die.
There was this...
I grew up with the pool.
We bought this big, like inflatable.
Almost like a trampoline but it wasn't bouncy.
Just like a giant circle that was inflatable.
And we'd have like one-on-one wrestling match to see you could stay on the top of it.
But the thing's diameter would touch the edge of the pool.
Like we had like a long pool that was in ground and around concrete.
So we're just like constantly getting thrown off and knocking knees and elbows.
Think we know heads on concrete but there was multiple times where there's like 10 people in the pool.
Two guys are on the top of the thing and I like...
Somehow got trapped under the thing and it's huge.
And I can't see underwater and I'm like trying to hit the top.
It's like a trapped under ice kind of feeling.
Yeah, it's...
Yeah, I do.
Thankfully never drowned.
But that feeling of being like, I'm gonna fucking die.
Which...
Not great.
Recurring segment I think we should have.
Since we've talked about a bunch.
Like things that induce anxiety.
Yeah, videos.
Got plenty of those.
Life in general honestly.
I saw one recently.
Yeah.
I don't know if you've seen this but it was...
This dude is paragliding.
Okay.
And he's doing flips and stuff.
And when he's at the top of his flip.
Like the wind changes or something.
He just falls into his parachute.
Oh no.
And gets wrapped.
He's straightjacketed in all the cables and wires wrapped in his parachute.
And he's a GoPro on and he's just falling to his death.
Okay.
He lives.
There's an emergency parachute.
He's scrambling.
He has to untie himself while he's falling.
Dude, what?
It's like a Houdini escape trip.
Yeah.
And he pulled the parachute out at the last second.
Dude, fuck.
Still hit the ground pretty hard.
But that makes me...
Dude, all these extreme sports grand they're fucking awesome to watch.
What are we doing?
Dude.
You're so out of control of everything.
Yeah.
Like mother nature, this example specifically, just gust of wind.
Yeah.
Change the whole game.
And now you're dying.
You were going into like, yes, red the narrow bro.
Coming out of it fucking, I'm gonna die bro.
Immediately.
Did my, some of my friends went skiing this weekend?
Yeah.
I have, I will never ski again in my life.
Wait, what?
Because nothing happened.
I mean, last time we talked about how many head injuries I've had.
Oh, God.
And like, that's not even that extreme, but like, even for that, I'm like, it's just not worth it.
It's probably one of the most common adult sports to get hurt in.
Because so many people casually do it.
Yeah.
But you can land rons, snap your ankle.
Dude, I went last year.
I was on a lift.
Yeah.
And obviously you can look down and see people skiing.
Yeah.
This dude just wipes out on a snowboard.
Board goes flying and he's just sliding down the hill unconscious.
It was terrible.
As I'm going up to go down and watching death happen.
Well, that's gonna be fun.
And then like, I see you see another ski like, oh, shit, like stop and call other people.
It's like, why are we doing this?
I dude.
My feeling exact, it is fun.
It's fun, but the fun isn't even close to worth it in my opinion.
No, dude, you can end your life.
Or be just like breaking a leg as an adult would be terrible.
Why do that to yourself for like 30 seconds of, whew, down the fuck you all too?
You hit a patch of ice and just, there's situations you literally can't control.
Even if you're a good skater.
That's the point I'm trying to make is that in those situations when you're just like playing with nature,
you're so out of control.
But once again, I love to watch it.
It's awesome to watch.
It's so cool.
You've seen the flying squirrel suit guy who do those ones are nuts.
Well, they just jump off a fucking mountain.
Like, you don't have any, I guess they have a parachute at the end, but just going like 160 miles per hour.
Yeah.
So there's a famous guy who does it and he's literally like, yeah, I'm ready to die.
So that's why you got to have that mentality.
He doesn't care.
Yeah.
I think he like try to commit suicide a couple times.
He's trying this way.
Yeah.
So he's like, I'm just going to have a good time and you know, I don't care at all.
That's the only time when I think it's okay.
Unfortunately.
When they want to die.
Green lighted.
When I hear those things, I just think of a very troubled person.
Not a thorough judgment, but when someone's like, I don't want to live, there's something going on now.
I don't want to say normal, but I would argue that we innately want to live.
Like, and that's something I'm sure you've heard the stories of someone jumping off a bridge.
Yes, they're probably saying like a shit.
Like, they regret it on the media.
Dude, fucking yeah, the ones I hear is Golden Gate Bridge is infamous for having the most people try to commit suicide.
The people who have survived that like, it's like a 300 foot drop.
And when you hit the water like that, it's concrete with the surface tension.
And the people who have survived, they say, there's a comment out there.
First thing they say, as after they jump, they go, shit.
Like, this is immediately like, turn it down this.
And I think we're just wired to survive.
Yeah, it's like life is that.
It's literally going until you have to die.
So when someone's saying, I want to end all of this.
Dude, we can figure this out, man.
You know, like, don't do that yet, man.
I guarantee you we can find a reason that you'd want to live.
Yeah.
But it sucks that it comes from people that are doing awesome stuff like that.
Yeah.
Yeah, dude, keep doing it.
That's...
I want to say this shit.
The squirrel suit guy is a weird one, because it's like he's come to peace with death.
Which is, which I think that's healthy in a way.
Yeah, I think that is, for sure.
But...
It's healthy once again.
I can't...
You live your life however you want it, you know?
As long as you're not hurting someone else.
But it's coming to peace with death.
You almost have to in that situation, right?
Like, I feel like that probably came after him wanting to die.
Like, you just said where he's like, I think I want to die.
And then he's like, I'm at peace with it because I want to.
But I feel like being at peace with death is good if you want...
You want to die of...
Quarant quote, natural causes.
It's gonna...
Yeah.
Yeah, we're like, you know, you know, you know, death is coming at the end.
It just is.
You're not gonna live forever.
And being like, I know it's gonna happen.
As opposed to being like, it's probably gonna happen soon.
What I'm flying through the end.
Due to my own actions.
Yeah, but I'm forcing the hand of death to kill me.
As troubled as that guy sounds, I feel like most people don't have that mindset.
No.
Like, the guy paragliding.
I don't know his mindset.
But I feel like a lot of people who do extreme sports like that, they get a close call like that.
And they're like, oh my god.
Yeah.
Most people...
And it's like, yeah, no shit, dude.
This could have happened the whole time.
That's...
And it takes that for them to realize.
It's a small thing.
That's it.
But it's...
Death is weird, man.
I'm not...
We're not old.
But I think about it more as we age in terms of...
It still feels fake.
Like, I know death is real.
I know things are gonna die.
I know I'm gonna die.
But it really doesn't feel like that's gonna happen.
That's some...
I saw some articles.
Psychologists think that we reconcile with death by thinking it doesn't happen to us.
Yeah.
I feel like it's just another adaptive mechanism.
Because if we were thinking, like, oh, it's all gonna end, we'd act in ways that aren't gonna keep us alive.
I feel like, oh, I'm gonna die any day.
But we know.
We know it's gonna...
I know.
But that's...
It's like, you know you're gonna die.
But do you feel like this is...
This is all good to just end at one point.
Everything's fucking train coming.
It's squashes immediately.
Dude.
It's weird.
I thought about it more seriously on the drive to my parents house.
No joke.
I'm Saturday morning where I was like, that's a two hour drive.
Yeah, we're just alone with your thoughts.
I had music going on, but you're just thinking.
And I'm like...
The thought of it just all going black at one point is so weird.
All you know is this.
All you know is this world and this life and you interacting with physical stuff.
And then one day it goes, yeah, it just stops.
But then again, you're not gonna know, I think.
We don't know what's after or so.
Yeah.
Well, I mean, you know, I grew up in a religious household.
But even the thought of living forever freaks me out too.
I like that one better.
It's better.
I think it's better, but I don't know, dude.
Just...
I don't know either.
I know that there's a...
I feel like you'll get bored.
Thousand years in.
But things changed so fast, dude.
Like, okay, think about if you were born.
Say a person who lives forever was born in 1900.
You got to see, like there's so much innovation.
Right.
You're not doing the same thing forever.
You could choose to, I guess.
But by force of the world and it's changing,
you would have to do something different.
At the same time, like the studies they do on people who are the happiest and stuff like that,
as you get older, you tend to get happier because the theory is that you get more...
You like accept what this is.
Yeah.
By the time you're 60, you're just like, I get it.
I feel like that's just you have more time to work shit out.
Yeah.
You process the world after years of experiencing it and you're like,
Oh, okay.
And you kind of understand, whoops, you know, some people.
Some people don't want to die.
I have her, which are me.
But I think it would be cool if I can live forever.
But it is, you'd also see everyone around you just die that you love,
which would be pretty awful.
Like parents, siblings, anyone, any kids you have, you see die.
I saw a story, some woman lived to like one of those crazy,
like 120 or something.
And she has, she had like a, I don't know, 70-something-year-old daughter.
Yeah.
It's nuts.
Who then died.
And it's like, oh fuck, it's like you.
You just created and watched an entire life and then watched it end.
Dude, what do you do now?
You cry until you die.
You literally do.
That's so fucked up.
Cause they, I mean, you know, you hear of kids dying,
like not in those situations, but imagine, like,
it's like you know their whole life.
You're seeing a full, long life.
You're watching a person die of death.
And the actual cause is essentially as they're watching your kid get old.
I wonder if they still look young to you though.
Do your siblings ever look like they changed to you?
Like maybe like a little bit here and there.
But like my brother, older brothers still look the same,
younger sisters, like they still look like the people I grew up with.
So I wonder if it works.
Maybe on that, we're like, they just look like the kids still to you.
You're also super old, so it was maybe it's like relative.
You look like a corpse.
So your daughter probably looks like a living person.
I don't know.
But it's still fucked up.
Don't give me wrong.
I don't think any is just wild to like, I don't know what mindset I would be in.
If I just watch my kids live an entire life.
Like you did nothing wrong.
They didn't die early.
You can be grateful that your kids lived a whole life.
Then they're gone and you're just still there.
Oh God, it's dark dude.
That was fucking so dark.
I don't think any parents see their kid die.
No.
It's tough.
Dude, talk about like you pit of me of pain through trauma.
Well, there's bad things out there.
But you know, people will talk about that love they have for Hans Zimmer.
The love between a father and a son.
It's like people will talk about that connection between parent and child
that mirrors nothing else in the world.
You won't understand that love until you have a kid.
So having that thing you love that much, die before you would be.
Dude, you break.
You would just shatter as a person into a million pieces.
And then you probably die soon after if you're 120.
Let's be honest.
But you die probably a pretty sad death.
Unless that, I mean, if you're at 120,
you've probably had a lot of time to think about death.
And you're really okay with it.
You're just like, this is just probably your greatest friend.
You're going to have them.
Because you've seen probably at that point so many people die.
So many that you know.
And you're like, well, yeah, you'll get a whole different group of fronts.
That's what happened when you get old.
Your friends just start dying.
Like if you get into your 80s.
Yeah, it's like, it's the flip of weddings.
There was a movie with Robert De Niro a while ago about this,
about literally that, where you hit a certain age.
And the events you go to are now all of your friends dying.
Oh, shit.
Yeah.
It's pretty good.
It's really sad.
Oh my God.
Yeah.
But that's been a little season.
Like, yeah.
Isn't that fun?
It's going to be bad, man.
Yeah.
I just want to lay it.
Well, actually, I shouldn't bring that up.
Never mind.
I'll tell you off, Mike.
Yeah, I don't want to bring it up on the podcast.
It's someone else's story.
Don't want to know.
Okay.
Sure.
Fucking do that.
But anyway.
Yeah.
No, I don't know, man.
I really, we're also, science is getting to the point.
I was trying to, this started from the paraglider.
Dude.
No, from the, from the, from the,
from the episode conversation we have.
It takes a dark turn into like,
this is so mean.
Are we okay?
Maybe this is just like an inward look,
how fucked up we are.
I told you after my,
my previous mic to the one you saw,
the, the, the host was like, dude, are you okay?
Oh, yeah.
That's awesome.
Like, yeah.
I'm good.
Dude, fuck.
But yeah.
Wait, what, what was it going to say?
Out of, oh, science, right.
There, there's, I mean,
you believe in science.
No.
Yes.
Okay.
A little bit.
It's a bit of a theory.
Exactly.
All right.
But they're like constantly,
not constantly, but consistently finding more and more ways
to like stop cell death, which is apoptosis.
Eventually, our cells are just like, we're done.
We have like a timer.
And if we can just figure that out,
I feel like we're going to come across something that's going to be
either April on our life for a lot longer
or make us live forever.
I don't know.
It would be with the,
I need that for CTE.
I need that to happen.
Dude, that's probably going to be,
I would assume that's probably going to be a treatable or curable thing
by the time you get it.
That'd be sweet.
And you will get it.
I'm just kidding, man.
I don't want to put that jinx on you.
That'd be fucking awful.
Oh, yeah.
I tell myself at all the time.
That's fine.
I'm going to get CTE.
You wake up with me.
Every morning I wake up.
I'm going to get it one day.
I'm going to get it one day.
Dude, that's probably worse than washing your daughter died
to watch someone go through dementia.
Yeah.
Watch yourself go through dementia.
You wouldn't know.
You find, like, who fucks that in the mirror every day?
Like, holy shit.
It's just fucking crazy.
Yeah, I wonder,
have they ever done studies on like,
the emotional,
status of them?
Yeah, a lot of people go into it.
People go into it.
Deep dementia.
Like, do they know?
They got to know on some level.
Because people are probably being like,
no, we did this.
Thank you.
Various.
Yeah.
Ugh.
But I mean, I've known,
there's one person that I know now who's going through Alzheimer's.
Yeah.
They, like, they're happy.
You can tell they're happy,
which is like kind of silver lining.
Like, they, they still have a sense of humor.
That's good.
They'll make the same joke 30 times a year.
But they're still happy.
And like, they, they still seem to have a joy for life.
So it's almost,
and I couldn't imagine being them.
I don't know what they're going through.
But it's almost,
it feels like it's almost harder on, you know, his spouse.
Every around them.
Yeah.
And his family who cares about them.
Yeah.
That's fucking cheating.
But anyway.
All right.
Topics.
I got some to work too, man.
Let me hear your, your, your chair story.
Oh, yeah.
This is so small and stupid.
But so I've been thinking about this story for weeks.
It's so great.
It's so average.
I'm so happy to finally be hearing it.
It's been, all right.
So that movie taught the new Top Gun came out.
Top Gun Maverick.
Do you see it?
Yeah.
Okay. It's pretty, it's pretty good move.
I was a fan.
It was, I thought it was, you know,
it's not, really got more hype.
Like people were telling me it's the best movie they've ever seen.
A lot of people said that.
Yeah.
And I was like, I don't know if I'm going to put all my eggs in that basket
of the Top Gun movie is going to be the best movie I've ever seen.
So anyway, saw it.
And I was like, pretty good.
Not the best movie I've ever seen.
One thing I'll say about that movie.
I love movies where they actually do the thing.
Yeah.
It's amazing.
So when they have real pilots and that's a real footage, like,
that's sweet in of itself.
Inside of it being a good movie or not.
Right.
It makes it much better of a movie.
And Tom Cruise has those, he did all that stuff.
He flew all those planes.
He's like, he can fly any airplane.
He has actually flew.
I thought they just sat in the back.
No, dude.
He has any vehicle license you can think of.
You know, they have like CDL for like truck driving license.
He has like top level licenses to drive anything once.
Is Tom Cruise actually a badass?
Yeah.
No joke.
He is.
Cause I, you know, I don't know if I did.
I didn't know if I was possible.
Like, that's mostly where I know him from.
And I was like, oh, he's an actor.
Yeah.
The more you read about him, the more you're like, this guy leans so hard into the,
he does everything himself.
Right.
Like, there, he got, when, uh, what was the mission possible, possible ghost protocol,
where he's hanging on the side of a plane.
Yeah.
He did that.
Like, that's him on the side of a plane flying like 10,000 feet in the fucking air.
Yeah.
So in this movie, he flew the planes.
I mean, I feel like that turns it into more of like a performative, like, like, if you
were seeing a play on Broadway, yeah, and people had, like this amazing tap dance or whatever
their skill is, yeah, it makes it that much cooler when, when they're actually doing, like,
have you seen John Wick?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He just, he actually does all that.
He's seeing practicing shooting targets and stuff.
Like, fuck it.
There's only so much you can hide, you know?
Like, you say they didn't have the training and then they have to like either a the combat
slower grade or they have to like have a stunt double for nearly everything.
It just chips away at the quality of the show.
Yeah.
So anyway, I see this movie.
I'm like, pretty good.
I thought same kind of vein of your thought where it's really cool that they did all
the stuff and the movie looks good because of that.
They have all these fighter jets.
They're going really fast.
They go do the mock 10 thing blah, blah.
Oh, I guess he's.
Oh, fuck.
Do it in the mic.
Yes.
All over.
Oh.
So I go home to visit my parents sometime and like typically we'll watch some movie at some
point where I visit where I browse into the movies and was like, Oh, top gum is pretty
good.
And my dad's of really like mechanical guy loves cars, loves planes, super into that stuff.
And I might have hyped it up too much.
And so we're sitting there and it's just I can see both my parents going into it would
be like, this is going to be good and just slowly turned to like, and just that didn't
like it.
No, they just I feel like a lot of the movie is a call back to the original of being
like kind of cheesy in 80s.
Yeah.
And they're like, this is not that great.
And the bet out of this, have they seen the original?
Yeah, my dad had.
But they're like, we get to the end of the movie.
And I'm like, what do you guys think?
They're like, it's okay.
I'm like, yeah, there is no worse feeling.
Yeah, especially when you're like, this is good.
And they're like, yeah, yeah.
So they like, they thought I was so invested in this movie that they bought me this shirt.
I could give two kids about the movie for Christmas.
They bought me this top gun shirt.
It's like such a miscommunication.
After they watch it or before.
After, okay.
Where they're like, yeah, it's just a little douchebag.
It's fucking top gun shirt.
That stupid movie is by me a top gun shirt.
It's like we know this things.
It's a bad, it's not a bad movie.
But in their eyes, it's like, oh, he likes this.
It's a kind gesture, but it felt like a pad on the head.
Where they just give me this one in top gun shirt.
Yeah.
So I mean, but it's like they're trying to connect, but they kind of miss the mark a little
bit.
It's all that's tall.
But that was a story.
That was a sad and sad situation before.
Yeah.
Dude, I mean, it's going to happen, parents.
Where they just, there's miscommunication all the fucking time.
They generally get you and they'll surprise you most of the times with how much they know
you and get you something.
Yeah.
But then everyone wants a while.
A top gun shirt happens and you're like, fuck.
What did I do?
Anyway, that's the top gun story.
I'd like to see a reaction opening that.
It was, pretty sure it was the, oh, thank you.
You know what?
Trying to just like, yeah, I really like this.
This was a good one.
It could be also that they're, they're all, my parents are funny people.
Yeah.
It could have been.
It's going to think you're a huge top gun fan.
I know.
That's what it was like to wear that shirt out.
I have never worn it.
I've literally worn on this couch twice now.
I thought this would be good wear on a podcast.
And then the story came up and you're against it in this fucking shirt.
So nice.
Yeah.
Anyway, on to topics.
Well, I had what he got.
No, I don't.
I was just going to say like there, I have learned to pretty much never recommend anything
or if I do not watch it with the person I recommended to.
Like the most, the heaviest I'll recommend something.
I'll be like to check this out.
I thought it was awesome.
Watch it on your own time if you want to.
Fair.
Because I more often than not, even the fact that you're recommending it puts pressure
on the person to like it.
And just overhypes it.
Even if you don't try to overhype, it's going to overhype it if you say you like it.
Yeah.
It's unfortunate, dude.
You ever think about how much emotion of yours is tied to it instead of it actually
being good.
But don't you want, there's still good things I'm very emotionally tied to in terms of
like film and music and stuff.
But we're such like experiential creatures.
Or if something good is happening at the time and you watch or hear a thing, you can totally
be like, that was a good movie or a good song.
And then you have in your heads really good and then you share it in the situation you're
describing.
We're like, let's watch it together.
It's either has an age well or it's not that great.
And you're like, fuck.
And then it feels like I never want to have bad taste.
And then that person's like, this guy, what shit taste?
And that's a deep personal attack.
Not attack, but it's a hit to your ego if someone's like, this thing sucks, dude, why
do you like this?
Well, that's the key to you to go to have no ego.
Dude, I was looking to a comic show.
My show rooms take my show rooms.
They will kill your ego for sure.
But there was a new comic saying that you'll do enough open mics to where your
ego just bottoms out his words say bottom.
I'm like, I'm like, dog fuck, I want to do.
That's what I want to do.
That's where you got to get.
And then you just start, you don't care as much.
Then you just build it up.
Yeah, build it from the ashes.
Exactly.
I'm going to recreate myself.
Yeah.
But the only way you'll get to the good stuff is when you had your ego just leave.
Because then you're not worried about other people's views, which you should be in that
field.
But at the same time, it's like the funniest stuff will come from you saying the stuff
you wanted to say.
Yeah.
Instead of trying to filter it through like, is this going to offend or is this going to
make me sound like a douche?
Or am I going to come off nervous when I say this thing?
Right.
It's only going to hurt you.
So hopefully that bottom out happens sooner than later.
I'm thinking my first mic.
Such a bad bomb that I just lose all ego in a matter of five minutes.
All right.
So first thing, some redigs on stuff we did last week.
The average penis size length thing.
Because when you pose the question of how long was this study done for?
Yeah.
I had to validate because I thought it was five to ten years.
It's studies all the way back from 1942 to today.
Okay.
Of just literally measuring people's penises from like medical stuff.
And they're getting bigger?
They're getting bigger.
They've increased to six inches.
Which once again points to the fact of the collective consciousness is just thinking that
bigger dicks mean better things.
And we're like evolving in the way of bigger dicks.
I wonder if there is a functionality thing to that.
I'd love to hear your theory of what functionality it can do.
I'll work on it for a week and make a pitch.
All right.
Tight.
Because that, I mean, maybe there is.
Could be.
I mean, most of the reason that evolution happens for stuff is because it has a function.
Yeah.
But what we talked about last week was like, can we trick our evolution into think because
it's a work conscious and we can like think about bigger penis, bigger penis, bigger penis
that we could just have as something that's not necessarily functional to us.
But I don't know.
Like a weird example of those Darwin and the Galapagos Islands where he did a lot of his work
on like, you know, what is it?
What is the thing about like horse fly fruit flies or something?
No, there's fucking saying about the survival, survival of the fittest, right?
Oh, yeah.
The top does that.
But then you also the theory of that there's a lot of like rapid evolution happening on
those islands.
But not to the extent that way later there are some Galapagos lizards that like moves from
those islands to another area and in two months grew horns in the next generation.
So like they spit out babies and some of the adults were physically changing to the environment.
Oh my God.
Suggesting that evolution can happen at a pace of months as opposed to like hundreds of
years and hundreds of generations of things.
Well, it would depend on the species, right?
Yeah.
Like how fast they reproduce.
Right.
But they're also saying that the adults themselves were having changes to their body.
So the same.
Really?
Yeah.
So they're all spring had it.
But they have physical changes.
The whole thing was like an individual organism can't evolve.
Just the offspring start demonstrating more traits that are suited to their environment.
These are all fine with these lizards did.
Wow.
Like it flipped the thought on its head.
Where they're like, wait, what the fuck?
These lizards are just growing appendages that fit them better in this environment.
Damn.
Which is pretty cool.
I was growing a bigger penis right now.
Just fucking have a monster dawn by thinking about it.
All right.
Just want to touch on that one because I had digging that.
Okay.
This is the beginning of the stuff that's new.
Latvia.
Which I don't even know where Latvia is.
If I'm being entirely honest.
I think it's Eastern Europe.
I think.
I don't either.
When someone were qualified to talk about this.
Absolutely.
When someone gets arrested for drunk driving, they'll repossess their car and send it to
Ukraine now to help the effort.
It's pretty awesome, dude.
We live in a place that probably has the least strict drunk driving rule.
I've never been in a state that's like, you can get like three here and they're like,
yes, okay.
You get like two warnings.
Okay.
So the third one's maybe the one where they finally pop you.
Yeah.
Which is insanity.
Yeah, dude.
Oh my god.
Every other state you get one, you are done.
And here it's like, you're just fucking get two.
And they're like, stop doing that.
They think the limits higher too.
Oh, like alcohol content.
No way.
Wait, I don't point away to like the standard.
I might be wrong about that.
I was going to say that it's not going to be crazy.
Well, actually, I think there's different levels.
So I think there's a certain level where it's the same as everywhere else.
But there's tears of it.
Which I'm on board with that.
Now, I mean, it's fucked.
That's a dicey topic in terms of like no one should be driving a car with boozing their
system.
Yeah.
And you kill someone.
So you're driving like a two ton piece of metal around ice beads and to just inhibit
yourself.
It's just second nature.
You don't even feel like you're moving just killing machine.
No, you're so used to just flying that thing around.
And then you add a boost to the situation and god damn.
But the idea of repossessing drunk people's cars that get arrested for that.
I think that's a good solution.
What do the cars do for Ukraine?
Like, where do they?
I don't know.
I mean, probably just like basic transport stuff.
Military all I probably need is more stuff.
Yeah.
We just keep sounding them shit.
That's kind of cool.
Yeah.
Once again, I thought everyone's thought of this war happening was going to be Russia's
steam rolls of Ukraine.
And it's just not happening.
Yeah.
Which is fucking nuts.
It's a landscape, dude.
So, dude, I've heard him talk.
Like, actually, physically like, no, I haven't.
You will not think he sounds the way he does.
He's a comedian.
He was a former.
He was an actor.
He was a comedian before.
But his voice is like this.
It's so weird.
He looks like a guy who would just talk like, I don't know.
I highly just listen to him once.
He's like, what the fuck?
It's very, very strange.
It's deeper and raspy and it sounds just weird.
All right.
What the fuck is that average?
Oh, there was a man.
There was a man who, apparently there's a Mario Kart ride and like Disney or something.
That's, seriously, that sounds pretty cool, right?
But I just put average American, oh, that's what it is.
The average American male is too fat to ride the ride.
Wow.
Yeah.
So, like, I guess you have to be in shape.
To ride the Mario Kart ride, there was, how does that do good business then if the average
man is fat?
You think it's good to have rides where you got to be in shape to ride it?
I don't know because most people are riding with forcing pressure.
Well, we're in shape to ride the Mario Kart ride.
Yeah, I mean, it sounds, it's like a good idea, theory.
But I feel like no one's going to do it.
If I went to a ride and they're like, you're too fat, they're like, all right, not riding
this.
I just, I just never, you're not going to go home and hit the gym.
No, I have to.
I have to, like, prove to the Mario Kart conductor guy.
I'd be like, I did it.
He's like, who the fuck are you?
Like, go home.
Spent like a year getting in shape to ride the fucking ride.
Hey, I would think most, mostly kids ride it.
Yeah.
I would think, but then it's talking about the average man, their parameters.
You couldn't ride it.
That's fucking, dude, to think that we're that fat.
That like, I mean, we talked about this last time.
Yeah, I guess equipment's just slowly compensating for us getting fatter.
Yeah.
It's weird because like, as I, I guess if you just go on public, you see a lot of overweight
people like go to a Walmart.
Yeah.
So many overweight people or any, I just say any big chain store, the general public
is fat.
It's sugar, dude.
Sugar and everything.
Dude, you know, it's fucked up.
The history of why we're getting fat, or at least why they think we're getting fat, is
in the 60s, we started making processed food.
Like trans fat, like, and processed sugar and stuff.
Since the 60s, our exercise and activity has actually increased.
Nothing has changed other than the processing of food.
And it's just making us so fat where they can just, our food is horrible in this country.
Yeah.
I mean, I think that we eat pancakes and syrup for breakfast.
That's a go-to breakfast.
It's so good.
I had some this morning.
Shaking cake.
You're eating well.
Yeah.
You are eating just cake for breakfast.
It's just so bad for you.
Oh.
It's incredible.
It's incredible.
But it's, it's like, it's terrible.
I mean, pasta sauce, loaded with, like things you wouldn't think should have shown.
You don't want to get real for a second here.
I'll tell you the truth about food.
One of my hobbies is, I mean, a, I'm a certified personal trainer.
You're having a stupid dude.
What?
Yeah.
My hobby's been fucking dumb.
I'm fucking with you.
But like, my hobby is reading medical science that relates to nutrition, mostly, like,
going on pub med and just reading stuff.
But like, it seems like there's somewhat of a consensus on the healthiest thing you
can do for your body is eat mostly plants and low fat.
Sugar tends to not, if it not have that much of a negative effect, unless you're eating
extreme amounts of sugar, but on your body.
So if, but fat has the opposite, it just clogs all of the pathways to clear things out
in your body.
So like keto or not keto, diabetics is a really good example where they've, mainstream
knowledge for a long time.
What, or probably still is to an extent is that you can't have sugar as a diabetic.
It'll spiked, it'll spiked your blood insulin, every blood sugar level and, you know, you'll
start to get stuff that doesn't heal, you'll get the leg removed.
But it's actually fat is the root cause.
Really?
So yeah, they take diabetics and they'll...
So I thought, I thought we got away from that.
I thought it was like originally fat.
Everyone's like fat's bad.
And then everyone's like, there wasn't arrow fat.
Well, shit, actually, it's sugar.
That's the problem.
Yeah.
Which I don't know what the low fat era, it's probably when you substitute things for
other things.
So if we took something and like put something else bad in it to make it low fat...
Right.
Well, I think that's what people were doing.
They make stuff low fat and pump sugar.
So when I say low fat, I, you know, it's whole food and fat from sources that are processed
are obviously the worst.
So oil is really, really bad cause you're literally getting just pure fat.
Literally fat.
With none of the antioxidants that come from the plant that, you know, your body just
absorbs that.
I mean, you had it thought olive oil is good for you.
Don't people say that?
It's not terrible.
But if you're trying, like say you're diabetic, let me bring up this study first.
That kind of paints this picture.
They took type 2 diabetics around 20 units of insulin a day, a lot of insulin.
And over the course of two weeks, they put them up mostly a whole food plant based diet,
but it was around like apples, white rice, and table sugar.
We're like the three main components for diabetics that were taking 20 units a day and by two
weeks most of them didn't need any insulin.
What?
Yeah.
It's fucking nuts.
And this stuff, there's this guy, uh, Pritik, his last name is Dr. who's been doing this
stuff with high-police...
Apple, rice and sugar?
Yeah.
Which are, by the definition of mainstream diabetes, that would fucking kill you immediately.
And it reversed their type 2 diabetes.
Reversed it.
To the point where they weren't diabetic.
Well, so that was all they ate.
Yeah.
Hmm.
But then, so that happened in the 40s.
Okay.
In 1940s.
There was a guy, Pritik, who was doing stuff like that.
And now they've replicated over and over and over.
There's this website called Mastering Diabetes with these, I always forget the name, but it's
a PhD guy in biochemical nutritional processes and the other guy has a Master's in public health.
And they both, one has type 1 diabetes, one has had type 2.
And they've, the type 1 one was deemed an intreatable or incurable type of diabetes,
because you just have it.
Because type 2 is your insulin resistant.
Type 1 is you don't make it into insulin.
Type 1 is born with it.
Yeah.
Well, your pancreas just doesn't make enough insulin.
So you have to take it.
As opposed to if you're type 2, you make tons of insulin, but you're so fat that you're
resistant to it.
It doesn't matter how much you make.
So you have to like literally add more to your body.
They literally, they're diets low fat, whole food plant pace, but it's ton, you can
use much fruit as you want.
Is anything that has no oil, you can essentially eat it.
You can eat nuts, beans, any kind of grains, any kind of fruit, any kind of vegetable,
and it reverses people's diabetes, which has almost unheard of.
How much sugar were those people eating though?
Like on the diet or same prior?
On the diet.
Probably tons.
Like you eat one date, you're eating like 40 grams of sugar.
Okay.
I mean, I feel like the added sugar is what gets you.
It wouldn't help, but in that world, it wouldn't be the thing that prevents you from reversing
diabetes.
Okay.
So say you were eating those pancakes with syrup every morning, but you weren't using
fat.
So you're just eating whole wheat and sugar.
You would still have capacity to reverse your diabetes.
It's fucking crazy.
Okay.
Yeah.
So I just got on a huge tangent.
But it's the same thing with heart disease.
We thought for a long time that you couldn't, you could only slow it down, but there's a
guy Dean Ornish who was actually up for being the surgeon general for the United States multiple
times, but he was like, nope, I want to keep doing this.
And he has like 40 years and making randomized controlled trials with using whole food,
plant-based diet to reverse prostate cancer, heart disease where they literally take people
who are like, end stage heart disease, have angina.
That's like crippling, which is like the pressure in your chest.
Essentially, it's like permanent with it when you're at that level, but they take echocardiograms
of their arteries before and after.
And like before it's literally like filled, or there's like 2% opening to where you're
gonna fucking die.
And at the end, there's nothing inside of it.
Your body can just heal itself when you just move out of the way and let it do its job.
Yeah.
It's fucking crazy.
So.
So, fast the problem.
Not sugar.
To an extent.
Because like, nuts are fine.
As long as you're not gorging on nuts, it's like it really comes down to, it's got
a balance, everything.
Yeah, just the more plants the better and don't eat like processed shit tricks your body
essentially, because it doesn't fill your stomach.
So you could, you could drink so much oil before you felt like full.
There's no fiber in it.
It's just, it's just literally calories going into your body.
So I need my soapbox now.
It's taking a turn.
Dude, I like learning about this stuff.
Hell yeah, dude.
It's fucking, it's awesome to know that a lot of disease, at least the ones we have in
the West, in first world countries are in your control.
Yeah.
Like a lot of cancers, heart disease, diabetes, which are the top killers of all of us.
Like most people will die from a heart attack.
60,000 a year, dude, every year.
Just drop.
Not COVID.
It's number two.
Alright, let's see.
Fat people in the Mario Kart ride.
I wrote serial killer clown fish and I don't, I don't know what that means.
Oh, here's a fun one.
Wait, isn't the clown fish super deadly?
So what?
I don't know.
Is it?
Isn't the clown fish the one from Nemo that he is?
Oh, shit, you're the one that's in the end of it.
I don't think they're dangerous.
I mean, they do have the ability to go to the one I want to hear that story, dude.
That's a weird one.
Oh, wait.
This is what it was related to.
I just can animals have social disorders?
Like can an animal be a psychopath?
Could there be like a monkey in a tribe of monkeys that literally is a serial killer?
I think animals haunt for sport.
Some animals.
Do you like kill just a couple of things?
But that's got to be more of a, like, I'm saying same species.
So social being, so that would be like a prey predator situation.
You know, but like say I'm a tiger, you're a tiger, and I'm like killing all your tiger buddies.
Yeah.
I mean, if you've seen the video of an alligator biting another alligator's arm off, no.
It's fucking wild.
Give me that hand.
Dude, he clamps onto the arm and just starts spilling.
Oh, just the dustbin.
He twists it off.
Oh, God.
The other alligator's just like, what are you doing?
Stop.
But I think that's kind of a psycho move there.
Yeah, that's true.
But then you wonder how much of that stuff is like territorial.
So much of it is wild is like either for mating potential or for like this is my territory.
Are there animals that kill or hurt other animals just as you want to end of the same species?
And that's where the serial clownfish came in, where I was like, why clownfish came up?
I don't know.
I don't know why that one came up.
But in my head, I was imagining just a clownfish just killing a bunch of other clownfishes.
I don't know why I got these aim of three.
You were just committing mass murder in the sea and eminy.
It's just like corpses stacked in a sea and enemy.
Good to happen.
I want that question to be answered.
Now, I want to like monkeys probably do that.
Well, there are some dark stuff that go like they cannibalize smaller ones and each other.
They do some sadistic.
They're like every animal part of us that goes to war and mutilates humans.
They have a lot of that.
It's like the most animal version of us is that thing.
But I've seen some videos weirdly enough that Joe Rogan would talk about for a long time about like how fucked up chimps are.
Joe Rogan always talks about it in the video.
I've never seen it, but we're at chimps.
We're like digging to one's back.
I was gonna say a chimped peels a guy's face off.
Oh, I haven't seen that.
They do go for the face and the genitals. That's the move.
There's a story like probably in high school where some lady had a pet chimp
and her friend came over and the chimp went nuts on the friend.
It ripped off her lips and her like eyebrows and gouges, her eyes on the ripped off.
Did something to her genitals.
That's like they're go to attack.
And they're so strong.
And they're fast.
Yeah.
Planned with the apes.
Have you ever seen make it or a hairless chimp?
No.
Oh, dude. I'll show you a picture.
They're jacked.
Like without hair you see their muscle and they're just like these buff little monsters.
It's nuts and they have giant nuts.
It's just so disturbing.
Like literally it's like buff thing with a huge set of nuts.
And it wants to rip off your face and your genitals.
No thanks.
But yeah.
No.
No thanks.
But I would assume that if anything to your point they'd probably be the ones with social disorders.
They have...
Yeah.
I see so many videos of them that they look so human.
I saw the other day.
Dude, it's even gone to a zoo.
It's freaky.
I know.
It's like, fuck.
There's people in there.
Dude, the gorillas the most always freaky me out.
Because they'll do things that look so human like.
Like there's...
Saw a video the other day where usually like sometimes gorillas will walk upright briefly to
do things.
Like you know, the like transitionary periods that like walk out.
It looks goofy, but it looks like a human.
Yeah.
And there's these two gorillas in the zoo somewhere that like do that more than on forest.
They have this trait in their bloodline that they've like...
It's...
You're...
That's what I'm saying.
You're watching them start to become human now where we're hitting an evolution in a period
with some apes where they're starting to be coming cavemen.
Wow.
Dude, it's...
What happens if we get to a period where like the things in the zoos are literally cavemen?
We're still on cages.
Yeah.
Because they're still like a...
A go...
A go period, you know?
Like they're not...
Their brain isn't fully...
They're not a home or erectis, which I think.
Or we're...
Yeah, because...
Wait, we're homo sapien.
Right?
Yes.
Yeah.
So they be home or erectis.
What do we...
We just have people in prisons?
I...
Well, that's what I was saying.
It already feels like that.
If you see a monkey at a zoo, it's like this thing should be in a cage.
But then...
You have these things that don't have the mental capacity to be like an average human.
But it could be in the jungle.
That's terrifying.
I guess we have like tribes out in jungles now, so it wouldn't be too different.
Yeah.
But then they just be like competing with tribes and that probably...
It would be hilarious if they started evolving in zoos and we released them into the wild.
And then tribes were like, what the fuck?
Still like deal with cavemen?
We're probably just way stronger too.
We lost so much of our like brute strength through evolution.
We don't need it.
I know, but like those humans would be like gorilla level strength.
It's be fucking people up.
We're probably good from that.
Or in our lifetime.
I'm saying...
Oh, yes.
You can see them evolving our time.
Yeah, I don't care.
Yeah, probably.
That's fair.
Well, when they evolve quickly, like those lizards did, and to homo erectis,
and they come for you because they listen to this podcast.
They're gonna be fucked to do it.
We're laughing at him.
Yeah.
He called me dumb.
Oh, right after the clown fish.
You ever seen videos of frogs biting each other or fighting each other?
I should say...
I don't think fighting each other.
Saw it recently.
I didn't realize, like, frogs don't have teeth.
Yeah.
And they don't have claws.
So when they fight, they just kind of like...
They like...
Flub on each other.
Mop!
They're like literally...
They can't do anything, but they're just...
They're like two things wrestling lubed up.
They're always slipping, sliding, trying to bite things, and they're just like flopping on each other.
It's one of the best things you can watch.
You're trying to have a good time.
I...
My Instagram feed.
Just all it is.
Videos of animals.
That's the best kind of food to have.
I just love watching animals.
Dude, it's some of the best...
Like...
There's so much shit out there, and that stuff is always interested.
It's always fascinating.
Yeah.
Today, I saw...
Apparently, crocodiles.
Sometimes they're in environments where, like, usually they're warm weather.
Yeah.
But sometimes they're in places where the water freezes over.
And they just hibernate, right?
When that happens, they stick their nose out of the ice,
and it freezes around them.
And they just...
They just stay there and breathe until the ice...
Whoa.
Defrost.
So I know...
I know Koi Fish will do that.
Like, people who have Koi Ponds...
Well, they don't need to breathe there, obviously.
But they'll swim to the bottom and winter in, like, the Midwest.
And they'll just sit there for three months.
Wow.
Yeah.
Why don't we have that?
Why can't we...
But, dude, three months, we got...
Three months, we got...
We got...
A whole rabbit hole of, like, how do cold-blooded animals survive?
Apparently, frogs have, like, antifreeze in their blood.
Dude, how do you have things happen like that?
Dude, that's fucking sick.
Dude, most of our inventions come from, like, stuff that exists in nature already.
Like, we've pulled so many pages from nature's book to be like,
Oh, yeah, that's how you do that.
It's pretty cool.
But, ways, how you ended up on the fucking alligator rip-off arm video?
No, no, I saw that.
You were like, oh, thank you.
Yeah, that was a separate thing.
There was a video of an alligator that I saw, which was pretty fucked up.
But, someone had died either falling in or died very recently into, like, a Florida...
Swamp?
Oh, baby, eating by an alligator?
No, it wasn't a baby.
It was a full-grown human.
It's just a video of someone, like, they're like, you know, standing on a thing.
There's a swamp right here.
Just an alligator swimming with a full-body human body in Smouth, with, like, clothes on.
Just face...
Yeah, just face down.
Just pulling someone's body.
Like, right in front of them.
It just killed...
Either it killed someone, the guy fell off and it just drowned him or something.
Oh, no, my God.
But, yeah, that one's really like, oh, my God.
It's fucking human body, dude.
So, fun animal stuff.
Fake problems.
Yeah, pretty much.
All right.
Oh, got it.
Went all the way back to the top.
Let's see.
Oh, do you follow the James Webb telescope stuff at all?
No.
You know it is, right?
Super powerful.
Yeah.
You know, the Hubble Telescope is.
Yes.
That was like our old one.
You know what, James Webb?
It's like, X amount stronger.
So we're seeing...
We're trying to see to the origin of the big bang.
Because that's, you know, the theory is, there's a center where the thing...
The bang happened and everything's flowing outward, consistently.
And we're trying to see, like, what is there?
What's the source?
What, like...
What are we gonna see in the middle of it?
This is just...
We're not there yet, obviously.
We're getting closer and closer.
I don't know if this telescope would have reached the center.
But it's changing our ideas of science about astrophysics and not astronomy, right?
Yeah, astronomy, not astrology.
Okay.
Because we're finding...
The original thought is right around the big bang.
It would essentially just be like particles of shit.
Like nothing's fully formed right around the bang, right?
Because that's the earliest beginning.
Like how we say the big bang's the beginning, but then, like we say it, it was caused by...
So, aren't the particles hitting each other?
Yes.
So there might have been something before.
It was just all white before.
That's it.
But the assumption is that...
Just your myself down.
Around it, it would just be like, unformed stuff.
There would be no planets.
It would just be tons of particles and whatever.
And we're really finding fully formed solar systems near it.
Oh, shit.
So it would just shift it all of our understanding of that back of like...
Are we just further away than we thought we were?
I don't know.
Maybe?
I just want to do it.
I want to know so bad.
What's in the center?
What could it be?
And what...
Or how about what's on...
What's on the other side of the moon?
Well, it's the craziest thing I can think.
No, but the universe is expanding, right?
What is it?
What's on the other side of the expanding?
What are we expanding into?
It's just going to be more stuff, right?
Because that's the center.
It's like we're on one side, you know, it'd be a big...
Sir.
I'm making motions with my hands.
You have the bang in the center.
Is the fist is the center?
Yeah, but where is that?
Oh.
I mean, that's what we're...
That's a good question.
We don't know what's on the outside of us.
We're looking inward, but what's wrong?
True, I mean, I think we...
On the outside of us, we know there's more solar systems
and galaxies and...
I think we've looked away from us.
It would be nuts if you'd never...
You'd never look around.
You'd never look around.
You'd turn around.
There's way more futuristic development.
There's like, oh, fuck, dude.
We've been looking this way the whole time.
Yeah.
We have to.
And just saw like probably more fully formed.
But I'm thinking it...
So, I mean, but even if we look behind us,
that stuff's part of the universe.
That is expanding.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But if the theory is it all came from like a tiny pin drop
and it's expanding outward,
what's on the other side?
Like where...
Where was the origin when it started growing?
Well, I think we're trying to look towards
what we believe is the origin.
That's what we're doing now.
But you're saying on the other side of it.
So, like, literally,
the opposite of the side we're on,
that side of the big band.
Probably just more stuff, right?
Or it'd be pretty cool if it was like,
literally an opposite world.
Like, what everything is here,
flipped on that side.
Just mirror image.
Yeah.
And then we actually, like...
That wouldn't be disappointing if that's all it was.
Yeah.
It would be shitty because then, like,
we'd have to admit that the circle was right
with this multiverse bullshit.
We'd be like, oh, yeah, you guys figure it out.
But, I don't know.
We also probably...
We couldn't get there for a long time.
Unless we find some technology that's like,
oh, we can use wormholes.
Or black holes.
Or holes, I don't know.
Yeah.
Would be cool.
But...
We have enough going on here.
Yeah, I got...
We got to solve these kind of my own shit to do in my own life.
Dude, I'm trying to do open mics.
Yeah.
I've got time to worry about the universe.
That's the chance.
That's what you do in open mics.
You ever have a...
Like, you interact with a bunch of people.
Or you're in a social situation.
And then you really feel like sometimes,
the...
I'm in a matrix kind of feeling.
Where stuff seems to like...
It revolves around you.
I don't know if that's the way to put it.
Do I ever feel like I'm at the center of the universe?
Yeah.
It sounds weird when you say it like that.
But like, you're the only thing sparking like...
Stuff to move around you.
Oh, it's a really weird way to...
Like you're in a video game.
Yeah, like stuff when you're not interacting with it.
Seems like it's not quite...
Not alive, but it's not...
It's like on a different plane of existence when you're not interacting with it.
Which they've done some sciences on it with like the double split theory.
Or they've...
It's a crazy setup for the experiment that I can't articulate.
But essentially, they look at an atom.
And they have a way of finding how it looks when you're not paying attention to it.
And it shifts into like a different version of itself.
And it suggested that like all atoms,
when not focused, are something else.
And then when brought into focus,
from you, from your perception, changes.
That sounds like Toy Story.
Yeah, it's essentially Toy Story with atoms.
But it's a quantum mechanics theory that's been like...
Is that the whole like by the nature that we measured it,
like us measuring it changes its form so we can never really know?
Could be.
But suggesting that, it makes me think of those situations where like...
If I'm not paying attention to something, it acts differently.
So if I don't show up to open mic night,
everyone's doing it on mic night.
Yeah, they're just all sitting there and chairs.
And then once I walk in, they...
Yeah.
It's possible, man.
It makes me...
I have those thoughts more than not.
It freaks me out for no good reason.
Just like getting coffee, but like...
The fuck is going on?
The fucking place.
I think my brain's broken.
I think you need an ego death there.
Oh man.
It's a scary thing.
When it's forced through drugs, it's a little bit...
I mean, the open mic version is also very scary.
Because then you're just...
You're feeling the worst you possibly can until it just...
dies.
The drugs one...
We'll do that expedited.
That scares the shit out of me.
Yeah.
But once again, it's based on the dose.
Yeah.
You could eat less, and you wouldn't...
You'd experience your ego...
like, lift away.
But a higher dose will definitely give you ego death.
Or it just takes all your problems and it goes...
Here they are, until you go...
BAAA!
And then it just dies in front of you.
And then you just...
Then you have a great time.
Wait, do you watch your own ego die?
Do you like see that in a visual form?
No.
No, no.
You just...
And sometimes it won't.
But I've had it where like, it'll bring up...
Like...
I don't know.
Like, not bad thoughts, but things I need.
Like I think about...
Things you gotta address.
Yeah. Like things I think about day to day, but I haven't put like actual thought into them.
And it gets you to like...
Try to think about them.
But your brain eventually just goes...
Like it just...
It goes not offline, but it just stops like...
Attributing judgment to the things you're thinking about.
It just like...
I'm trying to articulate it, but it's not coming out right.
Okay.
Because there's no feeling like it other than that feeling when you hit it.
And you're like, whoa!
You look at everything differently.
In that moment.
Wow.
Yeah.
So...
I know you're not a...
Are you a sports guy?
Not like actively following it.
Okay. Well, it's not.
This isn't really sports, but...
Yeah.
Do you hear about Aaron Rogers going on his darkness retreat?
No.
I'm sad.
I want to know if that sounds interesting.
He...
So, I mean...
What is a darkness retreat?
He wanted to...
He basically...
He wanted to take DMT...
Okay.
But he can't, because he's in the NFL.
Okay.
So he did this darkness retreat to simulate...
Or hopefully get the same effects of what you would get from taking DMT.
Interesting.
So he literally...
He went up into some forest and Montana or something.
Yeah.
And just...
Went in a small...
semi-underground...
Completely dark enclosure...
Okay.
For multiple days.
And had someone bring him food...
And didn't see light for like three straight days.
Who said that would...
Like imitate?
I've never heard of that thing.
I think he did.
I don't know.
He's so funny.
He's like...
Yeah, I can't do DMT.
But I'm gonna go see the dark room.
He's just purely trying to isolate his thoughts.
Yeah.
Why did he just...
I feel like you'd retail with some shit.
I feel like deprivation tanks are...
Typically sensory deprivation.
Yeah.
Most people will do those because they eliminate...
I mean, I think it's kind of like that, but more extended.
Like in a closet and Montana.
Yeah.
Fuck yeah.
Dude, I mean, on the topic of Aaron Rodgers...
Did you hear about the stuff that of him like...
Stealing $10 million from a fund used for like...
Poverished people to fund the school that his daughter goes to.
And like was incoots with a mayor on doing it.
And there's a text chambiturn.
My Aaron Rodgers doesn't have a daughter.
Oh, wait.
Brett Farff.
Brett, is it Brett Farff?
I think it's Brett Farff.
That's what it is.
My bad Aaron Rodgers didn't mean to shame your name.
That's my bad...
Brett Farff is the one.
Another packer's on it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's why I thought of it.
But, yeah, he like fucking...
It did hear about that.
And dude, the topic goes to Naluk and to it.
Because I love Brett.
It's pretty condemning.
There's little text messages between him and...
I think it's the mayor who is in charge of the funds that they took being like...
Brett Farff saying, are we gonna get caught for this?
Oh my God.
Yeah.
So...
I mean, yeah, ever since he retired,
a lot of sketchy stuff coming out with him.
The topic of CTE has come up a lot with how...
He talks about it a lot.
Yeah.
And in regards to the situation of taking money, it's like...
What they'll say, symptoms of CTE will be a lot of lack of judgment in a lot of ways.
And like this one's such an obvious...
You have this football tactician who's making decisions like this.
It's weird that it's so blatant.
And the man has tons of money too.
It's such a situation.
It's such a strange situation.
It's like, I don't know which is my mind when you have so much money
and then get caught dealing drugs.
It's like, dude, why?
Or taking...
You have millions of dollars.
Or just...
Yeah, doing something illegal to get more money.
You already have.
And I guess we would never understand
until you have it at the same time, right?
Dude, I think you just always want more.
That's...
Dude, how did he stop that?
Like some people give it up.
Like there's like what is it the 99% or club or a billionaires who've given away 99% of their wealth some just do it
they get
They have 20 billion dollars and they give away. I guess you still have like a billion then but yeah
It's kind of hope I hope you'd give away a good amount. Yeah, and then yeah, I'm fucking now like Bill Gates
Now fucking now
Bill Gates is doing a lot of good stuff dude
He's done so many good things he gets so much shit. He does but he's done. He's like he's tried
He's almost rid Africa of
smallpox or measles
But like I remember reading about him doing that that every time
Because there's a lot of hesitance to get vaccines in Africa because it's just a bunch of white people coming over there and being like
Hey, let us put this stuff in here and so like
They'll get they've done it multiple times with a little get like
90% the region covered that they need to eradicate the thing but the 10% won't take it and then they get it spreads back to people again
And there's just non-stop game of like whack them all with
Vaccinating this thing and getting rid of it, but it's it's like it they almost eradicated the whole thing
They've eradicated like one other disease there. It's it's truly impressive dude and he's been working with engineers to give like
What's the word sewage system stuff to all it's a most of Africa where they like get
African engineers involved and Bill Gaceous funds them and that goes down there and
Not guides the process, but you know, he's like an executive producer essentially on the engineering going on so
But now fucking no he gets a lot of shit. I don't think he should gives much shit
But it's probably just a lot less billionaires. Yeah, dude
Probably just like fucking kids somewhere. There's probably so many of those fucking kids after the Epstein Island stuff
There's so many rich people fucking children
Isn't that fucking cr- and also that stuff happened?
Nothing happened
All that comes out we're like oh yeah, duh
like
No one got convicted. Oh, oh, we have like flight lists of like yeah tons of people who went to this island that is an
Island filled with a child
pedophile human trafficking and selling hell on earth
And we just we we saw that information come out Epstein killed himself where the security cameras were turned off for that blank
moment the security guard took a break and
No one's doing anything
What what is happening and this is old by now. It's like what two years or a year ago that this all happened
And where I was like oh, yeah, what can you do?
Just gotta leave it
I
Don't know once again. What can you do?
us
Yeah, I yeah, I can't do anything other than like other than grow a podcast and get the word out and get killed by the CIA
For getting that because half the people in there were like in
High places and politics and there's all the famous people and and old presidents and
Just anyone can think of Donald Trump's on that list. There's this
He was a
FBI guy I believe and then went and did his own special unit in like child
sex trafficking to like take down these rings and
I forgot where I watched this guy, but it was like an interview for a couple hours and he was talking about how most of these
Pedophiles or child sex ring guys they always start with like normal porn like everyone and
They just it just kept progressing most of these guys were just normal people and like
Something went wrong that they just progressed to the most evil version of it and then ended up starting to like
Manage rings of this and supply with all of this actual content, but it's how do you become that evil?
I think because you don't think it's that evil when you're doing it you're like you get to a point where you think this is
Okay, or maybe not good like Hitler's a good example of that where in his head
He's thinking he's eradicating the bad thing. I don't know how that translates to child sex rings, but
They're probably I don't know there's a lot of ways to rationalize
Evil does something in their head to either ignore it. Yeah, or think it's okay
Yeah, just what are those things. I mean dude imagine
That's like is it just power that does that to you?
Well power does I would say power definitely corrupts for sure
You look at any instance of one man having power over people. Yeah bad things tend to happen
It's very rare that it stays good for a while. It like always falls apart
I can't think of one situation where like one there's a ruler somewhere. I guess Marcus Aralius
He's the most famous the stoic. Yeah, yeah, he he like maintained power for a long time and
To my knowledge didn't become super evil or tyrannical that's good, but like
That's great, but what I was I was side of that. Yeah, I think you're right. I think
Yeah, I can't it either corrupts you or just reveals that you are already a shitty person
I think it just it points to the idea that we're not meant to rule over each other
Like it's we're all human and the second we try to like create a power dynamic between one being higher one being lower
Yeah, it crumbles into evil stuff and it's just proven itself over and over and over to be that
Except for Marcus Aralius
He is the ally just be a stoic. Yeah, dude. It's really said that I learned about that guy recently from you know
The daily stoic is that guy Ryan
Fuck
Ryan holiday is his name
But he's he's like a student of a guy who was like one of the best writers from Stoicism and he writes these like
Consumer digestible books on stoicism
Okay, and he recommends
Meditation by Marcus Aralius, which is the stoicism book. Yeah, that's the first one
Then he has his own one of my friends recommended that book to me a long time. Yeah, I was gonna buy it and read it from an Xbox
I was like fuck yeah, I want to see what this is all about. It sounds super cool
It's like being disciplined and being good. I like that shit
Sounds like good qualities
All right, let's see what else we got we're almost at two hours so we can do a couple more and then
peel off here. Oh
My god, we talked about like learning things that
You should have known a long time ago and feel stupid learning the truth of them now
This is within the past year
When you go deeper in water and there's more pressure I
Just thought that was like a weird science thing of water. I never like you quit. Yeah, I never until this year I was like
Oh, it's the way it's just the weight of all the water on you. Okay, I
Because of my background I know that but I probably would have thought the same thing
Yeah, like I don't know how many
Movies or videos. I've seen like summer rains like where people are protected because they have a material around them
That's stronger than the the pressure of the water sitting on them. Yeah, and I'm like, yeah, it's weird
It's weird that water just makes it ears pop
Fuck
The guy in those I'm we all have those I guess but yeah, that's a good one. I like it. Yeah, it happened not too long ago
Oh super more fat stuff. I should you a jacry at all
No, I don't think I had anything I think kind of a absorbed by video games lately. It's not good
Couple games came out man. There's this one called Sun to the Forest which is like a survival game bird
It's just you and a bunch of buddies build a base and like there's all these weird mutant zombies and cannibals and stuff like that
It's such a blast but it consumes you. It's so fucking fun
And yeah, but no no crying. How about you? I watched Jimmy V speech
I won't get to me every time. Yeah, well theory. Well, he's saying you're laughing to cry and was the last one
Spend some time to thought that's what is yeah, which I have done
Definitely haven't cried that's for sure
It's hard to find something that's gonna make you cry every day think about trying to practice it off. Yeah every day
So you got a traumatic crying every day. I feel like dudes don't cry every day
I mean dude's rarely those sexist if you just they bro. I
Mean that's probably true
I'm definitely not crying every day and I haven't
Should we be I don't know I feel like I have I mean
This is from this anecdotal obviously of women. I know who have had periods of times crying
Every day for like a week or multiple weeks. I can't imagine that
That's tough a lot
Like when I'm unless it's from something like watching a video and you get teary-eyed and it's like a happy cry
No, just for your own shit. That's why I'm saying like sobbing because you're broken
For multiple days. What's that dude? A person?
I
Feel like guys are just more removed from our own notions. I think so we're not as like tapped into it
Dude, I thought I had a while ago. She has pros and cons
Yeah, I mean you can definitely I mean
this stuff you experience and the internal stuff you push down will just come out another way
That's the unfortunate part you can just ignore the world around you
But it's gonna come out in like some either a rage full way or Michael Richards what Michael Richards exactly like Michael Richards
Fuck what was he gonna say
Women crying every oh
So I had this realization a while ago maybe like years ago, but
When you look at race of anxiety in general and depression women have it higher just in general and
You know, I was just trying to figure like why would that be kind of situation and you know half
I would argue some of it is just due to hormone. We have a major difference in hormones, but there's also
If you're a woman
You probably have this overarching anxiety of feeling not physically safe
It is weird hearing my female friends talk about walking home
I've never feared for myself walk never from anywhere in a city
Yeah, and that's like always top of their mind it seems right. It's like you as a woman
You're this is gonna sound bad. Wait till a woman hears this
Physically inferior to men. No, but literally it's like in a situation
99% of women would not be able to protect themselves against an average man
Which is that thought alone that is terrifying you would have a baseline and men are probably more aggressive
Yeah, yeah, like you have a baseline of just anxiety that we don't we have
What like you said you've never thought about that of like I'm walking home at night
I'm scared that guys gonna jump out hurt me or rape me or something never thought I had ever
And they live with that daily every single day
Yeah, it's wild
We may have to change the name of like dark shit for the for the podcast been touching on a lot of dark stuff
But yeah, it's comedy though
Just kidding Jesus that's gonna be cut
No, it's gonna be snipped and taken out of contact. It's just clipped of me saying that dude
You could you could ruin my life with the amount of stuff. I well pry from the earlier ones
But if you clip the enough just damage. Yeah, all right one more thing and we'll wrap it up
Let's see you and on a fucking
Banger
I just asked you dude you I've been do you got anything? I have I have a stupid one
I have a silly one dude kind of hit me with it if you see these big red rubber boots people are wearing
Explain all right. They're called mischief rubber boots hold on I'm gonna pull them up
Celebrities are wearing them
They look like the Kanye boots
Or maybe they don't know what the Kanye boots are they they might be those because Kanye started wearing those and they look fucking weird
Oh, no, I have no what the fuck three hundred fifty dollars
Who's wearing these like famous people famous rich people they're expensive they look like
cartoon boot this guy's wearing them with jeans
That oh my god
I think is that where so I saw this yeah, and I'm just like am I gonna be wearing those in two years like is that
We're fashions because I feel like I'm always behind the trend
Once the last time you really wore like high-fashion stuff though because I guarantee that's
It's getting the market of like this is so artsy that it's cool, but I feel like it trickles down
I don't like dude. I remember when wearing like like sweatpants like this like tapered at the ankle
Yeah, that was super weird if a dude would wear sweatpants like true
I remember seeing that and being like that's insane now I wear them all the time
But that's a cool one
But it looks stupid at the time that that's what I'm saying like is this gonna become cool. Oh, man
I hope not that looks real bad
But that one that that one's like a scenely bad
It looks like a you look like a toy I know
But is that is that where we're headed? We're just gonna look like
cartoon characters big, but we look like we all have elephant Titus of the foot
Just flopping around with their big mutated limbs. I hope not man. There's also weird
I don't know I'm trying to think of the weirdest thing that I've been like oh, that's cool now that I wear that
Fashion wise changed
You do it's weird my in line with the stuff that my parents bought me that same Christmas. They bought me this fucking top gun shirt
They bought me a pair of sketchers
Okay, which I know about when you're growing up how sketches were looked at but like it was always like the
Nerd yeah, shoe and I can't get away from that feeling. They're like an effort to you
Never do where I'm do I want to go on walks, but I feel cool. I feel so weird. I feel like new balance is kind of become that
Yeah, they were definitely was the dad's shoe. It's becoming cooler. I
Just I can't the feeling in me so deep that I'm like I don't fucking nerd when I wear those shoes
It's weird. Skewers is rough. That's another level. I'm telling you a crock stew. I've never worn a crock a lot of people
Where I'm and they get shit on but people wear them. I feel like people wore my radically for a while. Yeah
Yeah, then like if you do that enough it gets to the point where it's it's just a thing people wear now
It's true. I
Guess but crocks offer like functionality like they're fun to super comfortable to wear
But like that big boot thing
Hey, it's not fun. It's not important
You're never break it's an angle like you're ballin in those
Yeah
Break someone's ankles with those boots on be pretty fucking dope. All right, well
Do we end it?
Send on that one. Okay, well till next time folks fake problems podcast
next Thursday
Tune in to the thing that's not on spot. All right